大话王-11
501
Audrey ! Wait !
502
Wait, Audrey. Ooh !
Hold on. Wait !
503
Wait. l just had an insight
into myself. l'm crazy.
504
You call and say,
"Wait, l'll be right over,"
505
and here's the crazy part--
l actually wait.
506
- l can explain this.
- l have missed a department meeting.
507
- Did you come in a cab ?
- Yes !
508
Where's your car ?
509
Thank you ! l can't tell you
how much this means to me.
510
- l can. $1,654.11.
- How do you sleep at night ?
511
l'm taking this.
[ lnhales Loudly ]
512
[ Loud Crunch ]
513
[ Tires Squealing ]
514
You scratched my car !
515
- Where ?
- Right there !
516
Oh, there.
That was already there.
517
Why, you !
518
You liar !
519
-You know what l'm gonna do about this ?
-What ?
520
Nothing ! Because if l take
you to court, it'll drain
eight hours out of my life,
521
and you won't show up,
and if l got the judgement,
you'd just stiff me anyway !
522
So l'm gonna piss and moan
like an impotent jerk...
523
and then bend over and
take it up the tailpipe !
524
You been here before,
haven't ya ?
525
Well, l can't remember
when l've had more fun,
526
but if you'll excuse me,
l have a class.
527
Are you marrying this guy
because you're mad at me ?
528
No, l divorced you
because l was mad at you.
529
- Wait. l want to talk about this !
- What do you want to say ?
530
ls this guy right for you ?
He is so... not me !
531
- That's one of his best qualities.
- But he's kind of a magoo.
532
- l'm sorry.
- You're wrong. Sometimes
maybe he is a little--
533
- Magoo !
- Yes. But since we've been going out--
534
- My God, l'm not having
this conversation with you.
- Audrey, you can't go.
535
- This is not fair.
- Fair ?
536
Okay, let's define fair. Last night
a five-year-old boy was crushed...
537
because his father lied to him
about coming to his birthday party.
538
- Fair ?
- Last night--
539
- Was none of my business.
None of my business.
- Thank you.
540
Two years ago, it was my business.
But l don't have to care anymore.
541
That's the magic of divorce.
But it matters to Max !
542
Everything you do matters,
and everything you don't do.
543
All right.
Now let me tell you something.
544
l'm a bad father !
545
l mean--
546
l'm a bad father.
547
You're not a bad father...
when you show up.
548
What if l come right after court
and play ball ?
549
Then you and l can talk before
you make any rash decisions !
550
No, we are leaving tonight.