251
Travels quickly.

252
Edie Britt was the most predatory divorc?e in a 5-block radius.

253
Her conquests were numerous...

254
varied...

255
and legendary.

256
Hi, Susan. I hope I'm not interrupting.

257
You must be Mike Delfino. Hi, I'm Edie. Britt.

258
I live over there.

259
Welcome to Wisteria lane.

260
Susan had met the enemy, and she was a slut.

261
Thank you. Ha ha. What's this?

262
Sausage putanesca. It's just something I threw together.

263
Well, thanks, Edie. Ha ha. That's great.

264
I'd invite you both in, but I was sort of in the middle of something.

265
And just like that, the race for Mike Delfino had begun.

266
For a moment, Susan wondered if her rivalry with Edie would remain friendly.

267
Oh, Mike. I heard you're a plumber?

268
But she was reminded that when it came to men...

269
do you think you could stop by later tonight and take a look at my pipes?

270
- Women don't fight fair.
- Sure.

271
Thanks.

272
Bye, Susan.

273
You can't order me around like I'm a child.

274
- Gabrielle.
- No. No, no, no. I'm not going.

275
It's business. Tanaka expects everyone to bring their wives.

276
Every time I'm around that man, he tries to grab my ass.

277
Ha ha. I made over $200,000 doing business with him last year.

278
If he wants to grab your ass, you let him.

279
Mr. Solis. You scared me.

280
Why is that bush still there? You were supposed to dig it up last week.

281
I didn't have time last week.

282
I don't want to hear your excuses. Just take care of it.

283
I really hate the way you talk to me.

284
And I really hate that I spend $15,000

285
on your diamond necklace that you couldn't live without,

286
but I'm learning to deal with it.

287
So can I tell Tanaka we'll be there tomorrow night?

288
John. We have bandage stop shelf in the kitchen.

289
Thanks, mrs. Solis.

290
Fine. I'll go.

291
But I'm keeping my back pressed against the wall the entire time.

292
See? Now this is what a marriage is all about -- compromise.

293
Is your finger okay?

294
Yeah, yeah, it's just a small cut.

295
Let me see.

296
Hmm. You know, mrs. Solis,

297
Um, I really like it when we hook up,

298
but, um, well, you know, I-I got to get my work done,

299
and I can't afford to lose this job.

300
This table is hand-carved.