I was awkward in middle school: bony and athletic, with a high grade in science and a low one in self-esteem. Though I had friends, I didn't fit the mold of popularity. I was picked last in flag football and I sometimes ate lunch by myself.

中学时代的我很令人尴尬：擅长运动，却骨瘦如柴；理科成绩好，自尊心却不强。虽然我有朋友，但我并不是人人都喜欢的那种类型。在夺旗橄榄球比赛中，我总是最后一个被选中上场的。有时候，我还会独自一人吃午餐。

I remember the day Brittany came to our school. She was from the Bay Area, and told us stories of how she had snuck out at night to meet older boys and smoke in the park. Her teeth were crooked, and she was a little overweight. Not that mattered though, because she walked around like she was better than all of us put together. She was incredibly intimidating, outspoken, and aggressive—a person you didn't want to cross.

我仍记得布里塔尼来我们学校的那天。她从旧金山湾区转学而来，当时还给我们讲了她以前如何在夜里溜出去跟年长的男生会面并在公园里吸烟那些事。她的牙齿长得歪歪扭扭，人也有点胖。不过这些都没关系，因为她走起路来趾高气扬，好像我们所有人加在一起都不如她似的。她极有震慑力，说话直来直去，还总是一副咄咄逼人的样子——她就是一个你不想去招惹的人。

Around Brittany, I tried my best to go unnoticed. Standing out or stealing her spotlight could only result in one thing: confrontation. I considered myself a chameleon, blending in with my surrounding and remaining the shy sixth-grader I had always been. I wore skorts and Tommy Hilfiger sneakers with red and blue laces, and my blond hair was frequently in a ponytail. Brittany and her friends wore shorts with words like "Hottie" on the seat. She dyed her brown hair black and got a perm like the other popular girls. All the boys were completely smitten with her.

只要在布里塔尼旁边，我就尽量保持低调。太引人注目或抢她的风头只会有一个下场，那就是与她发生冲突。我觉得自己就像一条变色龙，与周围的环境融为一体，保持着自己作为一个六年级学生一贯的腼腆形象。我穿裙式短裤和镶有红蓝相间的蕾丝花边的汤米·希尔费格牌球鞋，一头金发总是扎成马尾。而布里塔尼和她的朋友们却穿臀部印有诸如“辣妹”字样的短裤。她还像其他很潮的女生一样把一头棕色的头发染黑烫卷。所有男生都彻底被她迷倒了。

Although I could run for a touchdown, Brittany was always the first girl picked in flag football at recess and I was lucky if I was picked at all. I was thrown the ball while she stood with the quarterback, chatting about the last keg party she'd gone to. I didn't even know what came in a keg and had never contemplated drinking. She was flirtatious and mysterious while I was a declaration of what good parenting and strong Christian morals could produce. I had never been kissed, nor did I understand the tactics to get as far as she had gone with a boy.

虽然我可以持球触地得分，然而在课间的夺旗橄榄球比赛中，布里塔尼却总是第一个被挑中上场的球员，而我若能被选中，就算我的运气。别人向我传球的时候，她却在跟四分卫大谈自己最近参加的啤酒宴会。那时我还不知道啤酒宴会是什么样子，也从没想过要喝酒。她举止轻佻，很是神秘，而我则是良好家教和严格的基督教道德准则所能培养出的典范。从没有人吻过我，我也不懂那些伎俩，不知道如何像她一样与男生交往。