When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving much advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair of confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares. 

中文：

当我们坦率地问自己哪种人在我们的生活中对我们最具有意义时，我们常会发现不是那些给我们很多劝告、答案或对策的人，而是那些选择分担我们的痛苦，用温柔和亲切的手抚慰我们的创伤的人。朋友是那些在我们绝望和迷惘时与我们一起保持沉默，在我们悲伤和失去亲人时与我们一起共度时光，能宽恕我们的幼稚无知、苦无良策、心痛难复和与我们一起正视我们的虚弱无力的现实的人。那样的人才是真正关心我们的朋友。

——亨利·瑙文《走出孤独》