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Susan: Okay, I've got to break the ice here. So you're in counseling. Big deal. You want humiliation, I'll give you humiliation. I locked myself out of my house, stark naked, and got caught by Mike.

Gabrielle: Oh my God, when did this happen?

Susan: Today. Right before the party.

Mike: What can I say? Right place, right time!

Lynette: I think I can top that. Try getting thrown out of Disneyland for lewd behavior.

Susan: What? When was this?

Lynette: When Tom and I were first married, things got a little out of hand on Mr. Toad's Wild Ride.

Rex: You're kidding.

Lynette: No. We got perp walked down Main Street USA.

Gabrielle: Since we're doing true confessions, Carlos and I once broke a waterbed in Cancun.

Mike: How'd you manage that?

Gabrielle: Well, he used to have a thing for spiked heels.

Carlos: I'd just like to make it clear: she was wearing them.

Bree: Rex cries after he ejaculates.

Bree: So, uh, where will you be going?

Rex: I'll be staying at the Motor Lodge.

Bree: The hotel by the interstate has better rates, and uh, it's closer to your work.

Rex: Fine.

Bree: I'm packing your swimsuit. There's a pool there, and I know how swimming relaxes you.

Rex: When our kids ask where I am, what are you gonna say?

Bree: Um, I could tell them that you went to tennis camp. That was a joke.

Rex: Yeah. I got it.

Bree: There. Obviously, if you've forgotten anything, you can, um, come right back and get it.

Rex: Well, I'll call you.

Bree: Rex. In college, when we first started dating, people were so jealous of us. We were the golden couple. Everybody knew we were going to have this wonderful life. Why is this happening?

Rex: Because you can't even let me pack my own suitcase.

Susan: Hey!

Julie: Where are you going?

Susan: Just a sec...

Julie: Mom?

Susan: Don't worry, I'm not packing heat!

Susan: Hey, Brandi. Could you scoot a little? Just, scoot. Thank you. Hi.

Karl: What are you doing?

Susan: I'll be quick. Brandi, I'm sorry for the way I treated you. It was uncalled for and childish and it won't happen again. I have built up a lot of anger towards you, both of you, and I realize now that I just can't carry that around anymore, so, apology or no apology, I'm moving on.

Brandi: Mrs Mayer!

Karl: Brandi. Brandi, get in the car.

Brandi: Mrs. Mayer...

Susan: Please. Call me Susan.

Brandi: I just wanted you to know what happened between me and Karl, things got out of hand, because I thought your marriage was over. Anyway, I just wanted you to know I'm sorry. I really am.

Susan: Thank you.

Mary Alice Young: And though it came from an unexpected source, Susan finally got the apology she always wanted.

妙语佳句，活学活用

1. Big deal

Big deal 的本意是指“重要的人或事”，例如：She is a big deal in local politics. 她在当地政界是个大人物。但是在这里，Susan说的是反语，意思是“不是什么大不了的事”。例如：So you got the job after all-well, big deal!

2. Get out of hand

If situation gets out of hand, it can't be controlled any more. 例如：Things got a little out of hand at the party and three windows were broken.（宴会的局面有点失控，三个窗子被打破了。）In my first year at college my drinking got a bit out of hand.（我上大一的时候喝酒喝得很多。）

3. There

这里可不是“那里”的意思，而是“好了”，有点语气词的味道。比如有人哭的时候，你要安慰她就可以说：There, there. Don't weep any more. 好了，好了，别再哭了。

4. golden couple

在汉语中，我们常说一对夫妻或是情侣很登对、羡煞旁人，在英语中就是golden couple。

5. packing heat

意思就是carrying a gun。想不到吧！在俚语中，pack有carry的意思，heat有gun的意思。这里Julie以为妈妈要和抢走爸爸的女人大打出手，Susan则告诉女儿“自己没有拿枪（不是要打架的）”。

6. built up a lot of anger

意思是“生了很久的气”。这种搭配有俚语化的倾向，但不失为地道。例如：Lily built up a lot of anger towards her boyfriend. 莉莉生她男友的气生了很久。

7. Move on

这里Susan的意思是：She can't be angry anymore, so she's going to move past it. 不管Karl和Brandi道不道歉，Susan都不再介意了。例如：I realize that I can't carry the depression of getting divorced any more, I'm moving on.

文化面面观

Mr. Toad's Wild Ride

Mr. Toad's Wild Ride is a dark ride at the Disneyland theme park in Anaheim. It is one of the few remaining attractions that was operational on the park's opening day in 1955. The ride's story is based on Disney's adaptation of The Wind in the Willows, one of the two segments of the film The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad. It was once an attraction at the Magic Kingdom park in Walt Disney World, but after a long protest against its closure, Mr. Toad's journeys to nowhere in particular were put to an end in 1998 and the ride was replaced the following year with The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh.

思想火花

俗话说家丑不可外扬。对于自尊心极强、完美至上的Bree来说，丈夫在那么多邻居面前说出他们在进行婚姻咨询，无异于给她的心上划上重重一刀。因此当众位邻居说出自己的糗事以缓解气氛的时候，她恶毒的说出了丈夫的怪癖。从来都不认为自己错了的Bree在丈夫搬出家门的时候也不禁感叹：In college, when we first started dating, people were so jealous of us. We were the golden couple. Everybody knew we were going to have this wonderful life. Why is this happening? 其实，Bree也有脆弱的时候，只是，维护她完美形象的信念使她把自己认为不够好的地方都藏起来，只以优雅、完美的姿态示人。

鞋子舒不舒服只有脚知道，婚姻幸不幸福只有当事人知道。但是，两个人生活在一起是要过日子的，而不是要演戏给人看的。华丽的外表就那么重要吗？

考考你

把下面的句子译成英语。

1. I locked myself out of my house, stark naked, and got caught by Mike.
2. I think I can top that. Try getting thrown out of Disneyland for lewd behavior.
3. Hey, Brandi. Could you scoot a little?

Desperate Housewives 1《绝望主妇》1（精讲之二）考考你 参考答案

1. 我不想和那个书呆子约会。
I don't want to date with that nerd.

2. --我的钢笔不见了。
   I can't find my pen.

   --应该就在这附近吧，再找找看。
   It's gotta be here somewhere. Keep looking.

3. 我不想做饭了，想叫个外卖。
I'd rather order take-out than to cook by myself