A noise woke me up this morning.
What was that?
The crack of dawn!

It's gone forever - forever I tell you!

What has?
Yesterday!

Whats red and flies and wobbles at the same time?
A jelly copter!

Why did the sword swallower swallow an umbrella?
He wanted to put something away for a rainy day!

What's the name for a short legged tramp?
A low down bum!

Why did the man take a pencil to bed?
To draw the curtains!

What's the difference between an American student and an English student?
About 3000 miles!