Great news, teacher says we have a test today come rain or shine.
So what's so great about that?
It's snowing outside!

An ideal homework excuse
Teacher: Where is your homework?
Pupil: I was mugged on the way to school and the mugger took everything I had

What would you get if you crossed a vampire and a teacher?
Lots of blood tests!

Where did all the cuts and blood come from?
The school went on a trip!

What's the worst thing you're likely to find in the school cafeteria?
The food!