A lawyer died and arrived at the Pearly Gates.

Saint Peter asked him, "What have you done to merit entrance into
Heaven?"

The lawyer thought a moment, then said, "A week ago, I gave a quarter
to a homeless person on the street."

Saint Peter asked Gabriel to check this out in the records, and after
a moment Gabriel affirmed that it was true.

Saint Peter said, "Well , that's fine, but it's not really quite
enough to get you into Heaven."

The Lawyer said, "Wait, wait! There's more! Three years ago, I also
gave a homeless person a quarter."

Saint Peter nodded to Gabriel, who, after a moment, nodded back to
affirm that it was true.

Saint Peter then whispered to Gabriel, "Well, what do you suggest we
do with this fellow?"

Gabriel gave the lawyer a sidelong glance, then said to Saint Peter,
"Let's give him back his 50 cents and tell him to go to Hell