Subject: HORMONE HOSTAGE

The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his very life into his own hands.
This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driving licence in the wallet for every husband, boyfriend,etc.

DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!
ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: Could we be overreacting?
SAFEST: Here's fifty quid, buy yourself something.
ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some chocolate.


DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some chocolate.


DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn't overdo it today.
SAFEST: I've always loved you in that dressing gown!
ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some more chocolate.